Build up your Woman…

Build your Woman up!!

Commen Mindz Barbershop

Ok Grinders, we got into a very interesting conversation today at “Commen Mindz Barbershop” and this is what the the Owner; Knowledge had to say about the subject, “Building up your Woman”.

At some point in every person’s life we get to a point where you want to find your match, or should we say your life partner. This tends to be a struggle for both men and women; with our fast paced, over worked, underpaid society that has evolved from the fundamental core of the community; the family.

The fundamental family consisting of a husband, a wife, and children is now saturated with single parent households filled with tainted relationships and angry hearts. I won’t waste my time pointing the finger at who is to blame because this segment is not about that. I want to focus on the tenants of good healthy relationships and yes, they do still exist!! As a man, it is your duty to build your woman up; that is of course her stock is worth expanding upon. Most men are simple creatures. I say most because I never like to say anything is absolute.

A man’s concerns are centered around the five F’s. That is family, finance, females, food, and fun. The first two are confusedset in stone while the last three are variables that fluctuate depending the status of the first two. All things encompassed, a man’s thought process doesn’t venture too far from these five things in my opinion. We are of course talking about a genuine down to Earth man; a man’s man if you will. Throughout life we sift through relationships taking notes on the likes and dislikes of each person we come across and file that into our minds diary. As we gain wisdom we realize that we won’t find that perfect person because we also find out that we are not perfect ourselves. A genuine person is always aspiring to improve upon themselves in hopes of becoming an overall better human being. With that being said, when a man does find a woman he feels has a worthy stock that he would invest in then his mind typically shifts into a mode of testing the validity of her stock.

When I say stock; I’m referring to everything that makes her attractive beyond physical appearance: her character, her attitude, how she carries herself, her values, what she does for a living, her goals, dreams, and ambitions, and last but not least, her heart. Let’s assume that at this point the physical aspect of the relationship is satisfactory. It is natural for a man to act as a protector and an educator to his woman and children. The education aspect of a relationship is a constant reciprocation between man and woman. If you can’t learn from someone then there is no sign of potential growth, and one person will always be in teacher’s seat.


familyI say it is the man’s duty to build his woman up because in the fundamental family the man is the foundation. The building or educating piece is crucial because it helps in the overall positive nurturing of a fruitful relationship as well as putting both parties on the same page. It can be something as simple as reading the same book together and then the anticipated dialogue that comes from that will unlock some of the chambers of the mind that get down to the core of that individual. Everyone has their own vision in which they see things as well as their own method for problem solving. I think a man should initiate some sort of stimuli that will trigger a constant mutual growth. Because we are not perfect we have to build upon ourselves in order to mold and shape our mates into the people that best suites us. This of course is no overnight accomplishment but a lifelong process in which both parties are enthusiastic about the future and being the best servant to their mate that they can possibly be. Yes, as men we need to be fed sometimes too emotionally and mentally. A lot of times we just want to chill and relax depending on the trials of the day. The mind is always calculating and processing and there are some subconscious barriers that play a part in our psyche, especially as black men. That’s another conversation in itself. At the end of the day a man will take time to inspire, encourage, and love his woman if he is getting the same in return.

I encourage everyone to take a look at yourself in the mirror of evaluation before passing judgement on someone else. This is the first step to becoming a better person for your mate as well as yourself. Self-Save to become Self Made.

Peace and Blessings


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